


Fifty Shades of Skaro

by Kelkat9



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crack, Episode Related, Episode: s01e06 Dalek, F/M, Humor, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-06
Updated: 2012-07-06
Packaged: 2017-11-17 16:45:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/553720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kelkat9/pseuds/Kelkat9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Dalek in Van Statten's bunker absorbed information off the internet - like everything - the good, the bad, the porn.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fifty Shades of Skaro

**Author's Note:**

> I was reading a thread on fogsblue 's LJ journal and this was sort of discussed. Um then I went a little nuts with it. Warning - do not drink while reading this. This waaayyy crosses the line. Seriously. who_in_whoville came up with the title - she is so clever although neither she nor I have read Fifty Shades of Gray.

The Dalek had assimilated Rose Tyler’s DNA to recharge and repair itself.  After disposing of it‘s torturer, it made its way to an access panel and began absorbing energy and downloading the internet at an unbelievable speed.  It hacked into every computer connected to the internet absorbing governmental data on everything including the space program, defense systems, intelligence on terrorists, historical records, medical technologies, literature, music and yes, even pornography.   It was a massive quantity of information but Daleks were superior beings and designed to process information at an incredible rate.

Not unlike Time Lords, Daleks could multitask.  This Dalek was no exception.  While it downloaded and processed the internet, planned its next move, who to kill and how to destroy the underground bunker, it started to have other thoughts.  These were ideas which it had never had before and were triggering feelings it had never felt before.  It knew these thoughts and feelings were wrong and yet it was helpless to deny them.

It started with an obsession with the human girl that had showed it compassion.  Normally, it would find this evidence of weakness but somehow, it was finding this girl interesting.  It thought about her hazel eyes, creamy white skin and long blonde hair.  It assessed her biology including her body temperature and the hormones she was exuding.  From there, it calculated what she would look like without the fabric covering her body.  Daleks were not made to have creative thoughts and yet this Dalek had changed thanks to the girl whose body that now intrigued it.  Soon, its thoughts of Rose wandered until a certain piece of erotic literature that the humans seemed to be currently obsessed with filled its Dalek mind.  Although it did not understand what Fifty Shades of Grey had to do with the sexual exploits, the descriptions were quite vivid and it soon began imagining Rose performing such acts but she was not alone in the Dalek’s mind.

As it had absorbed a bit of Rose, it also imprinted on her desires and thus its thoughts turned to its enemy, the Doctor.  There was a conflict in its mind between its desire and what it knew of the Doctor.  And yet, it couldn’t help the visions of Rose and the Doctor and all the things it knew were possible and thus the Dalek’s first fantasy was born.

It imagined it had captured the Doctor and Rose Tyler. 

“Doc-tor!  You will kneel be-fore Rose Ty-ler!”  The Doctor glared at the Dalek but complied.  The Dalek then turned it’s blue eyestalk to Rose.

“Rose Ty-ler you will disrobe!”

Rose stared at the Dalek and then looked down at the Doctor.  “Is it serious?” she asked.  The Doctor shot the Dalek an evil look as it menacingly raised its weapon.

“Yeah, it is,” he said and looked at Rose. “I’m sorry.  If you don’t, it might kill us.”

“Oh, of course,” Rose moaned petulantly as she began to take her clothes off, much to the Dalek’s satisfaction.  When she was down to her lacy pink knickers and brassier, she stared at the Dalek with her arms crossed.

“In-suff-icient!  Dis-robe, Dis-robe!” the Dalek screamed.

“But it’s not fair!  Why does the Doctor get to keep his clothes on!” Rose shouted at the Dalek.

The Dalek then turned its eyestalk to the Doctor who looked up at Rose. “Fantastic,” he said sarcastically, “Now it’ll have us both naked!”  Rose smirked at this.  The Doctor quickly disrobed.  Rose watched.  So did the Dalek and maybe a little to closely for the Doctor’s comfort. 

The Dalek then turned it’s eyestalk to Rose expectantly. “Oh fine,” she said, pouting as she stripped off her brassier and knickers, tossing them off to the side and then looked down at the Doctor who was still kneeling before her.  He may have had a rather pleased look on his face.

The Dalek was very close to them now.  “Doc-tor, proceed with cun-nilin-gus!” it ordered.

“What?” Rose asked.  “Doctor, What’s it sayin?” Rose asked confused.

The Doctor’s ears had reddened at Rose’s innocent question. “It means for us to…you know,” the Doctor explained, nodding his head as if she should understand.

Rose looked at him, her brow furrowed in thought. “No, I really don’t”

“Oh for the love of all stupid apes everywhere!  It’s ordering me to orally stimulate you!”

A light popped on in her eyes and Rose looked down at herself and then at the Doctor.  The Dalek began almost rocking in frustration. “Pro-ceed, pro-ceed!” it ordered.

“Guess you better do it then,” Rose said with a cheeky grin.

“Right,” the Doctor answered with his large hands firmly holding Rose’s thighs he pushed her against the wall and spread her legs.

Rose gasped as she hit the cold wall and felt the Doctor’s tongue begin gliding across her sensitive flesh, his nose brushing against that most sensitive of places.  He laved and lapped at her folds dipping inside of her as she began to pant.  Heat quickly pooled deep inside of her and he moaned as his face was bathed in her desire for him.  Her hands gripped his most fantastic ears, her fingers gently tracing them and caressing them causing him to moan into her as he continued to delve deeper.  The vibration of his moan drove Rose mad.

His hands slid to her arse and he squeezed and massaged her.  Rose knew there would be bruises but she didn’t care.  The harder he gripped her, the faster and harder his tongue worked and his teeth began grazing her until he took that oh so sensitive nub of flesh into his mouth, sucking and nipping until she screamed.

The Dalek, meanwhile, was whipped into a frenzy.  It was rocking back and forth , its weapons whirring to and fro while it screamed, “Stim-u-late!  Stim-u-late! More!  More!” When Rose screamed, it shot it’s weapon, blowing up a monitor nearby.

When Rose caught her breath, she looked down at the Doctor who had a very pleased look on his face.  Rose grinned back and then noticed the Dalek was staring at her, it’s eyestalk almost trembling.  “Doctor, I think the Dalek’s a bit….,” she whispered as she stared at the Dalek.

“Randy, perverted and a bit obsessed,” he inserted and slyly looked at the Dalek.  The Dalek’s eyestalk whipped around until it was almost inches from the Doctor’s face.

“Doc-tor, you will stand.”

The Doctor did as he was told, his eyes never leaving the Dalek, but still looking for some way to escape.  Rose stood against the wall enjoying the view of her tall muscular Doctor when the Dalek screamed, “You will for-ni-cate! Fornicate!” as it leveled it’s weapon at the Doctor.

“Oh my Gawd!” Rose called out.  “The pervert Dalek wants us shag in front of it!” 

The Doctor turned to Rose. “Ya think!  There’s something’ wrong with this Dalek.  It’s not stable.  Just look at it shakin’ like that.”  The Dalek was in a frenzy, almost bouncing around.

Rose looked at the Dalek and the Dalek looked at her, its blew eystalk almost trying to send her a message.  “Doctor, maybe we should just do it.  It looks a little upset.”

“Rose Ty-ler will be sat-is-fied!” it shouted as it swung around behind the Doctor, it’s eyestalk almost fixated on the Doctor’s very fine Time Lord bum. 

Rose raised her eyebrows at that but couldn’t entirely disagree with it’s demands.  She also couldn’t blame the Dalek for being so focused on the Doctor‘s back side.  The Doctor did have a rather nice bum.  When she looked back at the Doctor, he was smirking.  “You enjoyin’ this?” he asked with a cocky smirk.

“I did not ask to be kidnapped by a smut obsessed Dalek!”

Suddenly the Doctor jumped forward until he was plastered against Rose as he felt the Dalek’s suction cup affix to his arse.  “Bloody Dalek’s feelin’ me up!” he exclaimed.

Rose peeked around and saw the suction cup glomped on to his bum and swore the blue eyestalk winked at her.  She tried very hard not to laugh.  It was obvious the Doctor was not amused.

“Pro-ceed!  Pro-ceed!  Rose Ty-ler must be sat-is-fied!” it screeched as the suction cup began pulling and pushing at the Doctor.

“All right, all right!  I’m gettin’ to it.  Mind your plunger!”  The Doctor said annoyed.

“Mind your plunger?” Rose repeated giggling.

He looked back at her.  “Less with the gigglin’ and more with sexin’ if you please,” he said, as his hands began caressing her around her bum, thighs and working their way to far more interesting areas.  Rose trailed her hands down his shoulders and chest until she had firm Time Lord bits within her grasp. 

The Doctor gasped, “Rose.”  Rose continued to cup and caress her fingers trailing up and down and around in a particular rhythm until her very well endowed Time Lord was firmly in hand.  She pressed kisses across his chest and licked circles around his taut nipples and after one particularly enjoyable nibble, found herself in the snog of her life.

The Dalek had remained oddly quiet, observing the two of them. The Dalek pushed at the Doctor with it’s insistent suction cup.  The Doctor was a bit preoccupied and tried to ignore it.  “More! More!” the Dalek shouted.  “Pene-trate!  Pene-trate!” he said in it’s freakishly desperate Dalek shriek.

Soon Rose was shoved against the wall, her leg hitched around the Doctor’s waist with her foot resting on the Dalek’s plunger which was still affixed to the Doctor’s bum.  Rose was moaning, the Doctor was thrusting and the plunger was plunging pushing him along.  The Dalek would shriek, “Dee-per! Har-der! Satis-fy!  Satis-fy!” but the Doctor and Rose were a little too busy to pay attention.

Rose was beyond thoughts of a randy Dalek as she felt the Doctor thrust into her.  He felt so good and had the most incredible rhythm, although she might have had one spare though wondering if it was the Dalek helping him along.  She soon lost all coherent thought when he touched her right in the perfect spot. 

The Doctor knew the Dalek was latched onto his arse and doing things no Dalek should do, but being inside of Rose was more of a distraction than his big Time Lord brain could conceive.  He was more concerned with the sensation of being inside of her, the slapping of their flesh against one another and the little happy moans she made with each thrust.  It wasn’t long before Rose was digging her nails into his back screaming “Yes, yes , yes, my Doctor!”  Both of them were soon screaming.  Although unaware, their screams were intermingled with the Dalek’s scream as it shook and shot off it’s weapon several times, destroying yet more equipment and melting a door.

It let go of the Doctor’s arse, watching as the Doctor caught Rose from sliding to the floor.  It scanned them with it’s eyestalk. “Satis-fac-tion a-chieved.”

The Dalek snapped out of it’s fantasy and scanned the facility.  It had learned all it needed to know from the download.  Now, it must escape and must find Rose Tyler.  Only then, could it continue.   Only then, could it understand why it was having these feelings and why it suddenly wanted chips and a cigarette.  
 


End file.
